Rest
by LilyValleyVeil
Summary: After the suicide mission, the crew is bruised and battered; this story follows them over the ship as they find comfort, and a place to rest.


Weary and wounded, Commander Shepard made her way onto the Normandy. She pushed debris aside as she went; seeing the ship battered and broken sent her flashing back to the first Normandy, now in pieces on the ground, Alchera its graveyard.

She shook her head to clear her mind. _This one isn't that one_, she thought. _This one isn't that one, this one isn't that one_; she held onto the thought like a mantra or a prayer as she stepped up to the CIC, looking at the sparking cables and support struts on the ground.

"EDI," she called, "can we get everyone together in one place?"

"Yes, Commander," she said. "The crew deck has taken only moderate damage."

"Thanks, EDI. Please open a shipwide channel."

"Channel opened, Commander."

"Attention all crew," she said. Her voice cracked. She cleared her throat, and when she spoke again her voice was strong and steady. "I know we're all shell-shocked, but there are things I need to say right now. Meet on the crew deck in front of the mess." She rubbed her eyes and stepped into the elevator.

And there they gathered, aliens and humans alike. They made neat rows in front of the mess tables. They spread to the sides. They spilled down the causeway almost all the way to the main battery. Many had the thousand-yard stare of those who'd seen horrors their minds couldn't yet process. Many had their arms around each other to comfort, to support the wounded, or just to feel the warmth of another living being.

The air stank of scorched metal and ozone. A thin layer of ash and dust coated almost every surface. And yet they waited patiently; their Commander was coming, and they were going to be ready when she did.

The elevator opened. Shepard drew in a deep breath and bowed her head. She took a step forward and stopped; it seemed suddenly that her legs wouldn't move. _I am not afraid,_ she thought. But what did you say to a crowd of people who'd been trapped, meant to serve as raw material to midwife a monster? What did you say to the people who'd fought beside you on that terrible organic ship?

"Commander," said EDI, her voice gentle. "You have brought them all back. Let them know what you brought them back for. This job is done. They need purpose now."

"You are alive," she said, wistfully. "You are all alive. And where there is life, there is hope." She paused. "At least, that is what my memory banks say on the subject."

Shepard smiled; her legs unlocked and she started to leave the elevator. Then she paused, a thoughtful look on her face.

"EDI?" she said, looking up. "What about you? Do you have hope?"

No reply came for a moment. Shepard stepped onto the crew deck, but before the elevator doors closed, she heard a soft voice speak. "I…believe I do, Commander."

The doors hissed shut, and she walked out to face the assembled crew.

When they saw her, they began to applaud, softly at first, then louder. It was solemn and glad at the same time; they clapped for her and for themselves, all tears and weary smiles, some on the same faces.

Shepard sat on the edge of the mess table. "Please," she said, "sit down." A great many did, with sighs of relief. A few did not. Grunt stood stoic near the back of the crowd. Zaeed leaned against the galley counter and Jack crouched on it. Miranda and Jacob were on their feet, their arms around each other for support, and she saw Garrus, her right-hand man, standing by the medbay wall. He nodded once, as if to say "_You can do it, Shepard."_

"The second order I give back on this ship and you're mutinying already." Murmured laughter; she grinned and went on.

"There are so many things I want to say to you right now, but I can't find the words, and this isn't the time for long speeches anyway. I will say that I thank you for your service and your loyalty and your courage. I will say that the crew of this Normandy is as fine as the first one, and that is the highest praise I can give."

She paused. "The Collector base has been destroyed. It's fair to say the Illusive Man is extremely displeased—"

"Fuck him, and fuck Cerberus!" said Jack. Shocked looks; heads turned toward Miranda, who opened her mouth and said, "For perhaps the first time ever, I agree with Jack. The Illusive Man can kiss my arse." Laughter rolled through the crowd.

"Oh," said Shepard. _How the hell do I follow that?" _she thought. "Ah…Thank you for the commentary, ladies. May I continue?"

"Oh. Yeah. Sure. Sorry, Shepard."

"My apologies, Commander."

"The Illusive Man is extremely displeased with the fact that I took the toy he wanted and blew it straight to hell. He wanted to keep it and use it. But it was an abomination," she said, slamming her fist into the table, "and I won't sacrifice my soul—our souls—to fear."

"And good goddamn riddance to it, I say!" called Donnelly. This was met with savage applause.

Shepard rubbed her forehead. "Thank you, Ken. Can I have the floor again now?"

"'M sorry, Commander. But it's true," said Donnelly, face as red as his hair. Gabby grabbed his ankle and pulled him down again.

"So he's pissed." She looked at the crowd, deadly serious now. "And I don't know what that means for us. He may decide that his investment and the goal is still worthwhile, and let us to continue the mission with his support. He may withdraw that support, and with that will go all the resources and power of Cerberus."

"But I'm keeping the ship," she said, and grinned.

"I know many of you have families, and I know the consequences for staying with this ship may be severe. We just don't know yet. But when we do—and you'll know as soon as I do—I promise you that anyone who wishes to leave will go with nothing held against them. I won't think any less of you."

"This job is done," she said, "but there's still hard work to do. The Reapers _are_ coming. And with Cerberus' help or without it, I'll be ready for the fight. But I can't do it on my own. I need a crew like you. I need you to keep the ship running, to come up with new ideas, to fight by my side."

"You've all seen what's out there. You know in a way some of you didn't before what combat looks like and what war is." She sighed. "And that hardens you. I know. I hate that it happened. But with that hardness comes strength and resolve."

She paused, looked down, then up again. "I know that too. And that's what I need, more than anything—a crew whose hearts and minds are joined, dedicated to a single purpose."

"That's all," she said, "…except for one more thing."

"I want you all to get some rest. The Reapers are out there, but they aren't coming today…so rest. There are boxed provisions in the galley. Gardner, open them up, and don't you dare try to fix a hot meal. There are blankets in the starboard cargo bay. When you go down to get some, bring a couple back for those who can't make it down there. There should be enough for everyone. Go to the medbay if you need it; don't try to tough it out. It would be stupid to go through what we've been through and then die from an infection because you got cut on some piece of that filthy ship."

Then the commander called to Tali. "Where are you?"

The crowd parted as the Quarian stood and went to the commander.

"Right here, Shepard. Always."

"I heard you give a blessing to a Quarian captain on the flotilla, once. Please, would you give it to me now?"

"Of course, and gladly." Tali laid a hand gently on her friend's shoulder. "May you stand between your crew and harm as you lead them through the empty quarters of the stars."

"Keelah se'lai," she said, and Shepard murmured the words in response.

"It's time to rest now," she said to everyone. "Find whatever place you can, and sleep."


End file.
